Sunday’s Iraqi “shoe-icide attack” on President Bush, as the NY Daily News coined it, makes you wonder how invincible the Secret Service really is.

If this were the movies, specifically Clint Eastwood’s role in “In the Line of Fire,” agents would have gone airborne in slow motion and took the shoe in the chest.

The fact that the attacker’s arm wasn’t broken before throwing the second shoe is absolutely inexcusable. Somebody’s going to get a memorable verbal beatdown by the boss. And is it only a matter of time before journalists have to take their shoes off at press conferences?

As an aside, President Bush’s reflexes are amazing. He likely could dodge the wrench in Ben Stiller’s “Dodgeball.” Not worth explaining the scene if you haven’t seen the movie.

In honor of the Nieman Marcus catalog offering $60,000 personalized, life-size LEGO vanity sculptures, The Working Stiff has touched base with a few insanely lucky (and driven) people who have turned their LEGO obsession into a career.  Stay tuned to this space for additional LEGO career inspiration over the next few days.

THE ARTIST: Robin Sather

HOME BASE: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

WEB SITE: www.brickville.ca

BACKGROUND: Is one of only six “LEGO Certified Professional” builders in the world and the lone Canadian. Founder of Brickville DesignWorks, a company that stages events, museum exhibits and educational programs. Robin is also the first LEGO artist to create a sculpture of the”Albertaceratops,” a newly discovered dinosaur species native to the region which was later named Alberta, Canada.

Q:  What are your gut reactions to the Nieman Marcus LEGO sculpture gift?  Underpriced, overpriced?  You familiar with this sculptor’s work?

My first reaction was “Fantastic!  Nice gig, Nathan!”  Nathan is a fellow “LEGO Certified Professional” (LCP), and a good friend.  Nathan does fantastic work, and has a brilliant artistic eye.  The personal sculptures are a great idea.

Q: Do you offer a comparable customized sculpture service?

I primarily do public building events where I create large structures onsite, sometimes with the public’s help.  I also run “Builders School” workshops for kids.  I don’t do as many commissioned sculptures as Nathan does, but I’m certainly open to doing them.  Every project is different, and presents its own challenges, and the costs will reflect that.

Q: What was/is your LEGO claim to fame that sparked you to go pro?

A few years ago, I helped to create a very successful major exhibit at our local Science Centre that prompted me to pursue more opportunities.  One of my favourite creations from that exhibit was a giant castle. After that show, I drafted the whole idea of the “Certified Professional” program, and proposed it to the LEGO Company.  Together we helped develop it further, and I’ve participated in it myself since then.  Now, there are six of us worldwide, with others coming on board soon!

Q: Does the LEGO company offer you any special privileges or access to parts?

Building entrepreneurs that become LCPs receive some special training, and have some great perks, like the ability to order LEGO bricks and elements directly from the company.

 Q: Has the crappy economy impacted your LEGO building business in any significant way?

Well, the economic downturn has not hit Canadians nearly as badly as it has Americans, but yes, a few projects have been postponed, or scaled back a little.

In honor of the Nieman Marcus catalog offering $60,000 personalized, life-size LEGO vanity sculptures, The Working Stiff has touched base with a few insanely lucky (and driven) people who have turned their LEGO obsession into a career. Stay tuned to this space for additional LEGO career inspiration over the next few days.

THE ARTIST: Jonathan Eric Hunter, a.k.a. “LeGogh”

HOME BASE: Carlsbad, Calif.

WEB SITE: www.legogh.com

BACKGROUND: Works as a “Master Model Builder” at LEGOLAND, California. Cannot accept private commissions.

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Q: What are your gut reactions to the Nieman Marcus LEGO sculpture gift? Underpriced, overpriced? You familiar with this sculptor’s work?

A: What a perfect gift! I’d have to say you could also spend less than $100 and see more than 15,000 cool LEGO models at LEGOLAND California. Nathan Sawaya (the artist commissioned by Nieman Marcus) actually worked at LEGOLAND California years ago after winning a nationwide Master Model Builder Search.

Q: What was/is your LEGO claim to fame that sparked you to go pro?

A: I love building highly-accurate and semi-functioning 1/8-scale automobiles.

Q: Does the LEGO company offer you any special privileges or access to parts?

A: Obviously one of the cool things about working at LEGOLAND California is the great discount we get on LEGO bricks and the ability to build some amazing models. All of the models we build in the Park use bricks that the general public has access to, but just last year I built New York New York Hotel on the Las Vegas Strip as part of Miniland Las Vegas and it was a surreal experience to build a model of a model skyline…so to speak!

Q: Has the crappy economy impacted your LEGO building business in any significant way?

A: Actually, despite the economy, LEGOLAND California has done very well this year. I think people are just reprioritizing their spending but fortunately, a lot of people are still investing in quality family time like taking trips to LEGOLAND. Also, our projects at LEGOLAND California Resort are constructed for all of our sister parks globally. We will be building numerous skyscrapers for the upcoming LEGOLAND Dubailand project. I recently went to Dubai for the official announcement and to take reference photos for building and layout.

Q: How many full-time builders does LEGOLAND employ?

A: LEGOLAND California Resort employs about ten of us now (designers and builders). With the upcoming Dubai project, we will hire a number of new builders.

Q: Are many of those sculptures hollow?

A: Almost everything we build is hollow. We build in support beams and other support systems as needed. Models taller than three or so feet typically have a steel frame inside.

Q: Any advice on scoring post-holiday discounts on the huge LEGO kits?

A: In my opinion, Target has the best after Christmas deals. LEGO sets are typically 25% off, then 50% off, then, believe it or not, 75% off!! The selection dwindles over time, obviously.

Red Sox obsession would dictate, that in New England anyway, a dead animal killed by Ted Williams would be a lot more valuable than a dead animal killed by a non-celebrity hunter.

That’s not what happened at yesterday’s estate auction from Dolores Wettach Williams, the third wife of Teddy Ballgame who was a former Miss Vermont and Vogue magazine fashion model.

She was also unhappily married for nearly every moment of her 1967-73 run with Ted, according to Leigh Montville’s fascinating book, “Ted Williams: The Biography of an American Hero.” Montville claims that Williams only married the fashion model because he had gotten her pregnant.

But back to these insanely low taxidermy prices.

North American decapitated deer have recently sold on eBay from a low of $46 to a high of $3,350. My deer-hunting neighbor, Dave, tells me the 8-point buck head in his living room cost him $450 to stuff.

You mean to tell me that the African buffalo ashtrays that Williams had sent to his Texas Rangers manager office are worth $330 less than Neighbor Dave’s wall trophy? Or comparing heads to heads, that a Williams-slaughtered 8-point buck is worth $160 to Neighbor Dave’s $450?

The cape buffalo killed by Ted sold for $550. Another decapitated African buffalo that hangs in a New York Stock Exchange social club has a $1,200 pricetag. No way those rich stockbrokers have more celebrity value than the Greatest Hitter Who Ever Lived.

Baseball nuts just must not want carcasses hanging next to their Dustin Pedroia and Kevin Youkilis posters.

I’m all for hunters who eat the meat, but I’m willing to bet that Ted never had Zebra stew or Kudu casserole. And there’s something excessively smug about these posed “conquest” safari photos that accompanied the auctioned beasts:

AND ONE MORE LESSON FROM THE MRS. TED WILLIAMS AUCTION…

Dads, pay attention to your kids. If you get lazy about it, consider the case of Ted Williams, who reportedly did not show up to the hospital for the births of son John-Henry and daughter Claudia.

Claudia wound up churning out gloomy-themed oil paintings that focus on death, death, death and death. Her work reminds me of a scene from the brilliant professional wrestling documentary, “Beyond The Mat.” Jake the Snake’s daughter keeps scrawling the word “Hate” in her diary to express anger at her usually absent father.

Most of her paintings went unsold to a snickering audience. And the auctioneers mockingly offered to toss in complimentary hot chocolates to anyone who’d make any bid on her stuff. If I were in Claudia’s shoes, I would rather burn my work than have it subject to this level of ridicule. Lucky for her, she wasn’t present for the bidding.

Here’s a creepy oil painting that didn’t sell despite its pseudo-intellectual title, “A Momentary Lapse of Reason.”

The auction catalogue says it is an example of “modern surrealism” and is inspired by Picasso.

It cautiously avoids the words “depressing,” and “suicidal,” two themes to keep away from your fireplace mantle.

Toward the end of the auction, I couldn’t resist plunking down $11.50 on this beauty, which the auctioneer sneered was a knockoff of a Star Trek alien:

The picture is inspirationally titled “Portrait of a Woman in Agony.” Hallmark cards will be banging on Claudia’s door any minute.

I have bold philanthropic plans for this painting. It’s either headed for a museum or my office Yankee Swap/ White Elephant party. And only you can decide its fate.

Click here to vote on where “Portrait of a Woman in Agony” will cheer up humanity next.

Want to swim with tropical fish and animals in their natural Amazon habitat?  There’s a way to do it without sneaking into the anaconda tank pictured above.

New England Aquarium biologist Scott Dowd is seeking nature enthusiasts to join him on an educational tour of the Brazilian Rio Negro rainforest from January 23 to February 9.

“We won’t be roughing it,” promises Dowd, referring to the expedition’s chartered boat with air-conditioned cabins and private baths.

The trip will include canoe-based wildlife tours, catching piranha, evening jungle hikes and fresh stream snorkeling with tropical fish.  Participants will also experience fish-themed parades and pageantry at the annual “Ornamental Fish Festival” in the city of Barcelos.

Cost is $3,000 plus air travel. Proceeds help support ongoing New England Aquarium research.

The Aquarium is helping the villages in the Rio Negro basin to better market their Cardinal tetra fish to the major pet store conglomerates in the United States. Under the slogan “Save a Fish, Save a Tree,” the campaign warns that the collapse of the local tropical fish economy would lead to massive deforestation.

For more information, call 617-973-5243 or email sdowd@neaq.org

Deadline is December 1.